Butler

Where’s Potpan? He should be helping clear the table. Is he carrying plates? Is he washing plates?

First Servant

When there’s only one person with good manners around here and he gets his hands dirty yelling at us too, it’s an unpleasant thing.

Butler

Get these chairs out of here, take away the side-board, take care of the serving dishes. You, be a good fellow and save me a piece of the marzipan, be so kind as to tell the porter to show Susan Grindstone and Nell back to the kitchen. Anthony and Potpan!

Second Servant    

Yep, we’re here and ready.

Butler

I’ve been looking for you and calling for you, and you’re needed now in the great hall.

Third Servant

We can’t be in the kitchen and the dining room at the same time. [To other servants] Keep smiling, boys, let’s be quick, and may the winner take all, as they say.

Capulet

Welcome gentlemen. The ladies will dance with you unless they have corns on their feet. Ah, my young ladies, which of you can deny you want to dance now? Any of you who acts shy must have corns, I’m sure of it. Did I hit close to home? Welcome, gentlemen. I remember back in the day when I wore a mask and whispered sweet nothings in a beautiful girl’s ear that could sweep her off her feet. Oh, but those days are long gone. You are welcome here, gentlemen. Come, musicians, play. Make some room in the hall! Make room, and get on your feet, girls.

Bring in more light, you fools, and fold away those dining tables. And throw some water in the fireplace--it’s gotten too hot in here. If I do say so myself, this spontaneous dance is turning out quite well. No, come sit here with me, my good cousin, for our dancing days are over. How long has it been since we were last partying in masks?

Cousin Capulet

By the Virgin Mary, it must be thirty years.

Capulet

What! It can’t be that long. It was after we danced at Lucentio’s wedding, and come this spring that will have been twenty-five years ago that we were at a masked ball.

Cousin Capulet

It’s more, definitely more.  Lucentio’s son is older than that, sir. His son is thirty.

Capulet

What are you saying? His son was still under 21 two years ago.

Romeo

[To a Servingman] Who’s the lady who is enriching that knight by letting him hold her hand?

Servant

I don’t know, sir.

Romeo

Oh, she could teach torches a thing or two about brightness! She shines in the night like a dazzling diamond in a dark Ethiopian’s ear. Her beauty is too precious to be used up during this lifetime, too precious for the earth.

She stands out from the other women like a white dove among a flock of crows. When the dance is over, I’ll watch where she stands, and make my hand blessed just by touching hers. Was I in love before? My eyes convince me not, since I never realized what true beauty is before tonight.

Tybalt

That sounds like the voice of a Montague. Go get my sword, boy. How dare he come our party disguised in that mask to sneer at us? By the honor of my Capulet ancestors, I say that striking him dead would be no sin.

Capulet

My nephew, what’s going on? Why are you talking so angrily?

Tybalt

Uncle, that is a Montague, our enemy, who has come to our party out of spite so he can mock our festivities.

Capulet

It’s young Romeo, isn’t it?

Tybalt

That’s him, that bastard Romeo.

Capulet

Calm down, gentle nephew. Leave him alone. He’s behaving quite properly. And honestly, everyone in Verona says he’s a nice, well-mannered boy. I will not have him mistreated in my house, not for the wealth of the whole town.

So be patient and don’t pay any attention to him. That’s what I want, so if you respect my decisions, you should put on a smile and quit frowning, which is not an appropriate look for a feast anyway.

Tybalt

It is appropriate when one of the guests is a bastard. I won’t tolerate him.

Capulet

You will indeed tolerate him. Listen young man! I say he will be tolerated. Go on. Am I the master of this house, or are you? Not tolerate him! God help me! You want to cause a scene! You want to make a commotion like a cock in the hen house! You want to show that you’re “the man!”

Tybalt

Why, it’s disgraceful, uncle.

Capulet

Oh, go on. You’re an insolent boy. So you think it’s a disgrace, indeed? Well, this foolishness of yours may just cost you, I know that. So you have to contradict me, do you? [To guests] Good Heavens, it’s time for the dancing. Well said, my dears. [To Tybalt] You’re acting like a conceited ass. You can go. Be quiet at once, or--[To servant] more light, more light--[to Tybalt] I’ll shut you up. [To guests] Oh, how marvelous, my dears!

Tybalt

Being forced to be quiet while I’m this angry makes my blood boil. I can’t do anything about it now, but Romeo’s intrusion into our party will turn my polite facade into bitterness.

Romeo

I fear I’ve defiled your hands, which are like a holy shrine to me, by touching them with my own unworthy hands.  But I have an agreeable way to make it up to you. My lips are ready to smooth over that rough touch with a tender kiss, like two devoted pilgrims before a holy place.

Juliet

Good worshipper, you’re too harsh on your own hand, as it shows a perfectly polite devotion by holding mine. After all, pilgrims touch the hands of saints, and the hands kiss when their palms are brought together.

Romeo

Yes, but don’t the saints and the worshipers have lips, too?

Juliet

Yes, pilgrim, lips that they should use for prayer.

Romeo

Well then, dear saint, let our lips do what our hands are doing. They’re praying for something after all, a kiss, so their faith doesn’t turn into despair.

Juliet

Saints don’t act first, although they may respond to prayers.

Romeo

Then don’t move while I get my prayers answered.

Now all the sin has been purged from my lips thanks to yours.

Juliet

Then that sin has passed from your lips to mine.

Romeo

A sin from my lips? Oh what a sweetly suggested trespass! Give it back to me.

Juliet

You kiss by the book.

Nurse

Madam, your mother wants a word with you.

Romeo

Who is her mother?

Nurse

Heavens, young man, her mother is the lady of this house, and a good, wise, and virtuous lady she is. I nursed her daughter, who you were just talking to. I’ll tell you, whoever lands her will be rolling in the dough.

Romeo

Don’t tell me she’s a Capulet. What fate! My life is in my enemy’s hands. I can’t live without her.

Benvolio

Let’s take off. As the saying goes, “Quit while you’re ahead.”

Romeo

I’m afraid that is only too true. Staying more would be my undoing.

Capulet

No, gentlemen, don’t leave now. We have a little something for dessert coming.

That’s so? Well, then, I thank you all for coming, honest gentlemen. Good night. [To the servants] Bring more torches here. Come, let’s go to bed. Oh, dear me, I swear it’s getting late. I’m going to bed.

Juliet

Come here, nurse. Who’s that gentleman over there?

Nurse

That’s old Tiberio’s son and heir.

Juliet

And who’s that just now going out the door?

Nurse

Bless me, I think that’s young Petrucio.

Juliet

And who’s that following him, the one who would not dance all evening?

Nurse

I don’t know.

Juliet

Go find out his name.

If he’s already married, I’ll likely go to my grave an old maid rather than marry anyone else.

Nurse

His name is Romeo, and he’s a Montague. In fact, he’s the only son of Lord Montague, your great enemy.

Juliet

The only love I’ve ever known comes from the only thing I hate! I met him too early, before I knew who he was, and I found out who he was too late. What a terrible way for me to fall in love for the first time--with a hated enemy.

Nurse

What’s this? What did you say?

Juliet

Oh, just a rhyme I learned from someone I was dancing with.

Nurse

We’re coming, we’re coming! Come, let’s go. All the guests have gone.