DAVINA: We're now joined in the studio by two heroes of the day, Macbeth and Banquo. Congratulations, gentlemen. You've had quite a day defeating the rebel McDonald, driving the Norwegians out of the north, capturing the traders Thane of Cawdor. Truly amazing. Order has been restored in the Scottish kingdom. 

BANQUO: I had my moments. It's true, but you should see this guy out there. I mean, Macbeth's amazing on the battlefield. Sword this guy, head of the guy. 

DAVINA: Nave to chaps and all that. 

BANQUO: Exactly. Did you see that one? 

DAVINA: I heard about it. 

BANQUO: They should call you that, Mr. Nave to Chaps. 

MACBETH: I was in the zone today. I have to confess, though the Norwegians had me a little worried. 

BANQUO: Oh my god, they were huge. They must have been like eight feet tall. 

MACBETH: But they had those maces. And by the time they got it over their head, you could just dart in their. 

BANQUO: Timber. 

DAVINA: Well, again, congratulations. Does this kind of thing happen often? 

BANQUO: You mean, war? 

DAVINA: Yeah. All this strife and conflict. It sounds pretty chaotic. 

MACBETH: It's a warrior society, Davina. Social order is a fragile thing, which is why it needs to be defended, no matter how much destruction it brings with it. 

DAVINA: Yes, well, it sounds like a real mess out there. But the good news is the war is won. As you put it, so foul and fair a day I have not seen. 

MACBETH: That's right, so foul and fair today. The battlefield looks like the end of the world, all the dead bodies, the blood, the fog, the smoke. I've never seen worse. 

DAVINA: That's the foul part. 

MACBETH: Yes, but we won. We're the victors and order has been restored, despite the incredible odds that we were up against. 

DAVINA: The fair part. 

MACBETH: Exactly. So foul and fair a day I have not seen. 

DAVINA: Right. So then here the two of you are on your way back from the battlefield when you run into three women, I suppose. 

BANQUO: You suppose we run into them, or you suppose they're women? 

DAVINA: Oh, you definitely run into them, but you're not sure what to make of them. You, Banquo, describe them as withered and wild in their appearance, that they look unearthly somehow. 

BANQUO: And that they might be women. 

DAVINA: Well, you think they look like women, except for their beards. 

MACBETH: We demand that they speak. They must tell us what they are. 

DAVINA: They speak, but they take turns hailing you. 

BANQUO: As they should. A hail is a greeting of respect. At least, they know their place. 

DAVINA: Well, the first one hails you, Macbeth, as Thane of Glamis. 

MACBETH: So they know who I am. 

DAVINA: You are the Thane of Glamis? 

MACBETH: I am. 

DAVINA: Well, the second one hails you as Thane of Cawdor. 

MACBETH: What? Well, that makes no sense. 

DAVINA: You're not the Thane of Cawdor? 

MACBETH: No. I just captured him on the battlefield. 

DAVINA: Well, then the third one says, all hail Macbeth that shout be king here after. Are you okay? 

BANQUO: Yeah, what's the matter buddy? They said you should be king. That's good news, right? They say anything about me? 

DAVINA: Not yet. 

BANQUO: If they can look into the seeds of time and say which grain will grow and which will not, I want them to look into my future so I can know what it is to. 

DAVINA: Well, let's see. The first one says, lesser than Macbeth and greater. Well, that's confusing. Then the second one says not so happy, yet much happier also confusing. And the third one says, thou shalt get kings. Get? 

BANQUO: You know, get, beget, have children. I guess they're saying that my descendants will one day be kings. 

DAVINA: And then though thou be none, thou shalt get kings, though thou be none. 

BANQUO: So my descendants will be kings, but I won't. 

MACBETH: Excuse me. I want to know why they called me the Thane of Cawdor. The Thane of Cawdor lives. We just captured him. And the idea that I could be king is—well, it's just not possible, no more than it's possible that I could be the Thane of Cawdor. So I demand to know what they're talking about and why they've gotten in our way like this. 

DAVINA: Yeah. Well, sorry, it's right about then that they vanish. 

MACBETH: Vanish? 

BANQUO: Well, it's a bit foggy. 

DAVINA: As you put it, Macbeth, what seemed corporal, you know, having a body, melted as breath into the wind. 

MACBETH: If only they'd stayed. 

BANQUO: Are you sure we even saw these creatures? I mean, maybe we ate something that was beginning to mess with our mind. 

DAVINA: Is that possible? 

BANQUO: Yes. Around here if you eat certain roots, it starts to make the brain, cshh. 

DAVINA: Ah, right. It takes the reason prisoner, you say. 

BANQUO: It takes the reason prisoner. 

DAVINA: That sounds about right. 

MACBETH: Your children shall be kings. 

BANQUO: You shall be king. 

MACBETH: And Thane of Cawdor. Isn't that what they said? 

BANQUO: That's exactly what they said. 

DAVINA: I'm sorry, it's right about at this point that Ross and Angus show up. 

BANQUO: Two of our fellow thanes. 

DAVINA: Well, Ross wants you to know that the king has heard all about your success on the battlefield and is incredibly impressed with your bravery and military prowess. 

BANQUO: That's what I'm talking about, buddy. 

DAVINA: And as part of his reward for your accomplishments, he asked Ross and Angus to greet you as—well, this is interesting—as the Thane of Cawdor. 

BANQUO: What? Can the devil speak true? 

DAVINA: Did you say devil? You mean those women, you think they were from the devil? 

MACBETH: The Thane of Cawdor lives. Why do Ross and Angus dressed me in borrowed robes? 

DAVINA: Well, according to Angus, the Thane of Cawdor it is a alive. That's true. But the king is having him executed for being a traitor. 

MACBETH: Glamis, Cawdor, your children shall be kings, huh? That's what the ones who gave me a Cawdor said about you. 

DAVINA: I'm sorry. Gave you a Cawdor, is that what you think happened? 

BANQUO: And what about you becoming king? But you know what, we should be careful here. Sometimes evil spirits lead us to destruction by first earning our trust with the little things. 

DAVINA: You mean, like the promise of becoming Thane of Cawdor? 

BANQUO: Right. Something like that gets our attention, but then they lead us from there into moral danger, you know, after gaining our trust. Anyway, the king is waiting for us. Would you mind if I—I got a text Ross and Angus to let them know that we're on our way. 

DAVINA: Well, you don't really need to—sure, go ahead. 

MACBETH: Two truths are told as happy prologues to the swelling act of the imperial theme. 

DAVINA: Two truths. Oh, you mean the Glamis and Cawdor bit. And did you say prologues like in a play, a play about becoming king? And I'm confused. Is what these women said good news or not? 

MACBETH: It can not be ill. It cannot be good. 

DAVINA; That doesn't help. 

MACBETH: If ill, why have they given me earnest of success commencing in a truth? I am Thane of Cawdor. 

DAVINA: So you're saying if it's bad, why does it start with such good news, that you're Thane of Cawdor now. 

MACBETH: If good, why do I yield to that suggestion whose horrid image doth unfix my hair and make my seeded heart knock at my ribs against the use of nature? 

DAVINA: Suggestion, horrid image? Are you saying that this news has you imagining terrible things? 

MACBETH: Present fears are less than the horrible imaginings. 

DAVINA: I'm sorry I'm having trouble keeping up. What could be in your imagination that's that horrible? 

MACBETH: My thought, whose murdered yet is but fantastical. 

DAVINA: Murder. You're imagining a murder? 

MACBETH: Shakes so my single state of man that function is smothered in surmise. 

DAVINA: You're really moving too fast. Functions smothered in surmise? 

MACBETH: Nothing is, but what is not. 

DAVINA: My brain starting to hurt. Nothing is but what is not? Oh, I get it. So that thing that's in your brain, which is imagine, because it's not real, is the only thing that is, because it's the only thing that you can think about. Is that what you're saying? And let me get this straight. Are you thinking of killing the king so that you can become king? Is that why you mentioned murder? 

MACBETH: If chance will have me king by chance may crown me without my stir. 

DAVINA: Well, that's a good point. If it's your destiny to be king, then it should happen all on its own. You shouldn't have to kill anybody. 

BANQUO: Sorry about that. We really should get going. The king is expecting us. Dude, you need to snap out of it. Being the Thane of Cawdor gets you going? Sometimes you have to break into new clothes before they feel comfortable. 

MACBETH: Come what, come may. Time and the hour runs through the roughest day. 

DAVINA: That's right. Let the chips fall where they may, as we like to say. Time just keeps on trucking no matter how bad things get. 

BANQUO: We really have to get going. Duncan's waiting. 

MACBETH: Right, sorry. Let's keep thinking about what happened and talk about it later as friends would. 

BANQUO: I'd be happy to. 

DAVINA: Good luck gentlemen. And again, congratulations on your victory. The battle has been won. 

BANQUO: Thanks. 

MACBETH: Thank you.