Sofia: Thanks, Ralph. We're back with well, Lucentio I suppose, given this situation. And this gentleman here. 

Merchant: Can I just interrupt for one second, and say just how excited I am to be here. I mean, this is one of those things you hear about, but it never really happens. I mean, here I am. I'm on my way to Padua. And the next thing you know, I'm on television. I mean, what incredible luck. I'm just saying isn't life amazing. 

Sofia: I suppose it is sometimes. 

Merchant: Yeah, well, I'm sorry. God save you both. I just wanted you to know I'm thrilled to be here. 

Sofia: So, why don't we take a second to get to know you a little bit better. There's already been a little confusion about your profession. It's been suggested that you're some kind of traveling merchant, or maybe a teacher. 

Merchant: Well, I'd be happy to clear that up. Boy, as a child I had so many dreams of what I want to be when I grew up. I was thinking of different professions. I wanted to be a Joiner, but I'm not a Joiner. And I thought maybe tinker, because I tink. Maybe that might be good, but. And bellows mender is a little bit-- you need a lot of you know, this. And I'm not that. But I do have aspirations that carry me even further. 

Tranio: I'm actually anxious to hear where you're from before we get to what it is you do. 

Sofia: Well, OK. 

Tranio: I mean, are you just passing through. Or is Padua your final destination? 

Merchant: Now, well, actually I'll be staying in town for a week or two. And then going on to Rome, and then on up to Tripoli, God willing. 

Tranio: And where are you from, originally? 

Merchant: From Mantua. 

Tranio: From Mantua? God forbid. And you've come to Padua? Are you trying to get yourself killed? 

Merchant: What? Killed? Well, no. Well-- what are you talking about? And, and no. I have no desire to get killed just for the record. 

Tranio: I can't believe you haven't heard about this. Do you want to tell him, Sofia? 

Sofia: No, you can tell him. 

Tranio: It is certain death for anyone from Mantua to come to Padua. Our Duke and your Duke have started a terrible feud. And they're both making all sorts of threatening proclamations. I guess it's because you've been traveling that you haven't heard about it yet. 

Merchant: Wait, I could be killed in Padua for coming from Mantua. 

Sofia: Isn't life amazing? 

Merchant: Oh, it's even worse than you say. 

Sofia: Worse? What could be worse than death? 

Merchant: I've come to Padua to collect a bunch of money for some guys in Florence. So I can't just turn around and leave. I need to collect that money. 

Sofia: Sounds like this guy is a merchant to me. 

Tranio: You know what? I think I can do you a favor. Have you ever been to Pisa? 

Merchant: Oh many times I've been to Pisa. A town of very sober gentlemen, Pisa. 

Tranio: So do you know Vincentio? 

Merchant: No, I don't know him. But I have heard of him. Isn't-- he's a very rich man. 

Tranio: He is my father. And you look a lot like him actually. 

Merchant: All right. As Biondello puts it, as much as an apple looks like an oyster. That doesn't sound right. 

Tranio: Anyway. What a stroke of good luck that you look so much like my father. We could just pretend that you're him while you're in Padua. You can take his name. Live in my house. And do some of the things my father would be doing. And then you can get your business done at the same time. How does that sound to you? 

Merchant: Oh, well that, that last part especially sounds great. And I'll never forget you-- that you saved my life, and my liberty. Thank you so much. 

Sofia: Isn't life amazing? 

Tranio: Well then, we should get going. Oh, by the way-- 

Sofia: Right. Better not forget that part. 

Tranio: Someone might call on my father about my upcoming marriage to Baptista's daughter, Bianca. 

Merchant: Oh, you're getting married. Oh, congratulations. 

Tranio: Thanks. So as my father, you might get asked about the lands and money that you've guaranteed for the dower so that Baptista will agree to the wedding. It's no big deal, really. I'll go over the details with you. But first, we should get you changed into something just a little nicer. Thanks, Sofia. 

Sofia: Good luck, gentlemen. 

Tranio: And just look, right out here.