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[Petruchio’s home outside Verona. The weather is cold. Petruchio’s rascally servant Grumio has just arrived, having been sent ahead to ensure that everything is in order for the arrival of Petruchio and his new wife Katherina. It will help to appreciate the humor in this scene if you imagine that the actor playing Grumio is rather small, which was the case at Shakespeare’s Globe Theater.]

Grumio

Fie, fie on all tired jades, on all mad masters, and all     
foul ways! Was ever man so beaten? Was ever man so    
rayed? Was ever man so weary? I am sent before to make     
a fire, and they are coming after to warm them. Now, were     
not I a little pot and soon hot, my very lips might freeze
to my teeth, my tongue to the roof of my mouth, my heart
in my belly, ere I should come by a fire to thaw me. But    
I with blowing the fire shall warm myself, for, considering
the weather, a taller man than I will take cold. Holla, ho, Curtis!

Grumio

the weather, a taller man than I will take cold. Holla, ho, Curtis!
[Enter Curtis, the head of the household staff]

Curtis

Who is that calls so coldly?

Grumio

A piece of ice. If thou doubt it, thou mayst slide from

Tranio-as-Lucentio

I thank you, sir. Where then do you know best
We be affied and such assurance ta'en    
As shall with either part's agreement stand?    

Baptista

Not in my house, Lucentio, for you know
Pitchers have ears, and I have many servants.
Besides, old Gremio is hearkening still,    
And happily we might be interrupted.    

Lucentio

And what of all this?

Biondello

I cannot tell, except they are busied about a
counterfeit assurance. Take you assurance of her, cum     
privilegio ad imprimendum solem. To the church take the        
priest, clerk, and some sufficient honest witnesses. If
this be not that you look for, I have no more to say but     
bid Bianca farewell for ever and a day. [Starts to leave]

Biondello

I cannot tarry. I knew a wench married in an    
afternoon as she went to the garden for parsley to stuff
a rabbit, and so may you, sir; and so, adieu, sir. My
master hath appointed me to go to Saint Luke's to bid
the priest be ready to come against you come with your     
appendix.

Biondello

master hath appointed me to go to Saint Luke's to bid
the priest be ready to come against you come with your     
appendix.
[Exit]

Lucentio

I may, and will, if she be so contented.
She will be pleased — then wherefore should I doubt?    
Hap what hap may, I'll roundly go about her .    
It shall go hard if Cambio go without her.    
[Exit]

Petruchio

Happily we met, the happier for thy son.
And now by law, as well as reverend age,
I may entitle thee my loving father.    
The sister to my wife, this gentlewoman,
Thy son by this hath married. Wonder not,    
Nor be grieved. She is of good esteem,    
Her dowry wealthy, and of worthy birth,
Beside so qualified as may beseem    
The spouse of any noble gentleman.
Let me embrace with old Vincentio,
And wander we to see thy honest son,    
Who will, of thy arrival, be full joyous.

Katherina

Forward, I pray, since we have come so far,
And be it moon, or sun, or what you please;
And if you please to call it a rush-candle,
Henceforth I vow it shall be so for me.

Petruchio

I say it is the moon.

Katherina

                                 I know it is the moon. 

Petruchio

Nay, then you lie. It is the blessèd sun.

Katherina

Then, God be blessed, it is the blessèd sun,
But sun it is not when you say it is not,
And the moon changes even as your mind.    
What you will have it named, even that it is,    
And so it shall be so for Katherine.

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